Chapter 20: Remember Mom, you cut that umbilical cord

Back to Kansas City.
So many things changed in my life. I got engaged. I moved back in with my parents as I didn't want to live in the barracks on base. Lucky me that the one I&I duty station one could get stationed at would have barracks, however it was a hard toss up. Barracks = living back at home. Field Day Inspections = curfew.
Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, but even though I was engaged and 21, she gave me an 1 am curfew. Yes, a United State Marine, with a curfew. And the umbilical cord was reattached. My fiance moved up from Florida to Kansas City. He didn't have a place to live, so he moved in with us. Since my mom was super Catholic and very conservative, my fiance slept in my room and I slept with...her. This was her way of preventing "scandal". I think it was more of a way to keep me up at night. She snored like...I can't even explain it. The bed vibrated from her snoring. Only 8 months of this...
I checked into my new unit and had no idea what to expect. I had spoken to one of the Marines from the office, so I knew at least one person.
I felt a tad out of place. There was one other girl there on the staff, but she was on her way out, so I was all by myself. The men weren't used to a woman being on staff, so they had to remember not to walk around the building half naked. Granted, you would think that they would know that.
I was quite annoyed that my mouse pad would disappear every time I went to lunch. It was an awesome Jayhawk mouse pad. If it was missing, then someone would change "Jayhawk' to "Chickenhawk" for "Gaycock". So not cool. I was singled out, but not because I was a woman, but because I was a KU fan. I was stuck in an office of freakin' Mizzou fans. This was an absolute punishment. Remember guys, friends don't let friends be Mizzou fans.
I&I Duty was different than what I used to. There wasn't a heavy work load and it was pretty laid back. There were a lot of officers in the unit and a lot of senior enlisted.  NCO's were had to come by in this unit, which to be honest was a tad odd to me. We practice funeral details quite often and other than that, we just chilled. We didn't even have to field day. They actually had a cleaning crew. A girl could get used to this.
The one thing that I couldn't understand was this whole consolidated admin stuff. I scanned paper in for another office to run into the pay system. Seriously, monkeys could have done my job. I think the monkey on the receiving end of my scanned paper wanted to kill me. I just couldn't figure out what they needed. Wait...I think that makes me sound less intelligent than a monkey. Maybe I am slower, but I eventually got it and even improved the process. Yep, I went from office monkey to King Freakin' Kong! Once I got used to this whole I&I business, I was happy with the change. And then Drill Weekend happened...


  1. ROFL!

    And then drill weekend happened and you got to meet.... ME! :D


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